Farrah passed today at 4:30 in the afternoon. She went quickly. The vet gave her a sedative, then a muscle relaxant, then the final drug. She was gone within a minute of that drug. That tells me that her systems were failing. I also gave her permission to go today. That tells me that she was ready.
I'm in a daze now. I knew it was the right choice, but it hurts like nothing else has ever hurt me. My eyes are stinging, my head hurt. I don't even know if I'll get any sleep tonight. All I know is that I have the puppy to take care of and the cats as well.
I just want to thank everyone for their wonderful supprt. I really do appreciate it. This is going to be hard gor a while, but we'll be fine. Thank you. I'll always love you my baby girl.
Mom, Gypsy Road, Sugar (cat), Keifer(cat)
Angels: Flash, Tooney, Scrap, Starlight, Buttons and new Angel Farrah
That's what her vet said on Friday.
Farrah has a wound, around the tumor, that is open a little. I have to clean her butt daily, mostly because of runs, apply medication to prevent infection, twice a day; her Prednisone has been reduced to a half a pill, every other day; she's been put back on Flagyl and Immodium for those liquid runs.
She eats on meats now. She's refusing to take her vitamines. She's been put back on glucosomine/chondroiton hard chew treats, four times a day, she's had her wet food, but I had to bake it for her. She seems to like it. She did gain a pound back though. 43.1 up to 44.8, which is good.
Her doctor said that she and her whole staff were amazed at how well she was doing, when she arrived there, but now, after her visit, she's been tired and down. It could be another hump, but I really hate seeing her like this. So, time is really coming to an end for Farrah. A month to two at the most. I hate it. I really hate it.
This has been a tough weekend for my baby girl. She doesn't want to eat her own prescription diet, but would rather eat mine and her Auntie's human food.
She's lying around a lot and sleeps alot, but yet, still wants to go for her walks. Her joints could be bothering her, because it is cold here. Extremely cold outside. She's also been a little meaner these past couple of days. We're not putting down just because of that. We haven't even decided that yet.
I mean, when us humans because sick or are stiff and sore and just don't want to be bothered, we tend to get mean as well. She's not biting anybody, but she growls at Gypsy and sometimes jumps at him. She may nip at his neck, but doesn't bite. We're watching her though. She may rebound and be her loving self in a few days.
It's just been emotionally draining and every day that we have with her, we are treasuring, but we're really not sure how much longer she can hold out. I hate these times. I really do. It's just not fair. I mean, she could be milking it, but I don't know. She goes back to hervet for another visit on the 24th, unless she takes a turn for the worse. I just want to thank everyone on dogster for their strong support. It's been hard and while we are still fighting, it's getting harder.
Jo, Farrah and gang
Her tumor grew. The cancer spread to the lymph node and is growing. Her vet couldn't tell whether it was in the abdomen or pressing on it as it grows, but her abdomen is a little firm. Her heartbeat and pulse are great though. Farrah has been put on a prescription diet. I don't remember if it was Science Diet or the other one, but it's the I/D diet. She can only eat soft food. She can't eat hard food anymore or soft food with chunks of meant in it (she loved her Pedigree). The vet only gave her a few more months to live, so yes, we are nearing the end.
I expected it to grow, but this is hitting me now as I type this. We're just going day by day now, enjoying the "bonus days" that we have with her.
This can't be happening. This can't be happening. Not this way.
This is not easy. Farrah is not doing good at all. On Friday night, she threw up five/six times after giving her a Purina "Busy Bone". She would drink right afterward, but then throw up again.
This whole week and weekend, she's been hiding under the side table. She's not as interested in playing, but she still wants to go for her walks. She's almost constantly tired and nauseous for a few hours after eating. She's also had some small amounts of blood in her stool.
I did call her vet, who found nothing in the stool sample that I dropped off on Friday. She said that Farrah was stable, but from what was described to her, she said that we are basically coming down to the end here. Farrah's next visit to the vet is this Friday. The family is actually considering putting her down Friday, depending on how the visit goes.
This cancer is taking her faster then we were even told. It looks like she isn't going to make six months. It's hitting me and my room mate pretty hard. We can't even tell if Farrah is showing us any signs or not.
My heart is breaking in a thousands pieces right now, because I don't want her suffering (I believe that she is now), but I also don't want to let her go, because she still smiles, at times.
My room mate and I would appreciate what you all might think and suggest that we do. I do know that I also have my own health to worry about as well.
Man, what a week this has been! Farrah has had pretty good days this whole week, but it seems like, whenever she gets dog food, she gets nauseous and possibly throws up. She doesn't throw up everytime though.
The same thing happened tonight. I've never thought this would be stressful, but it is. Everyone who has a family member with cancer or a pet with cancer knows the feeling. There are times that I don't even know what to do.
Her brother Gypsy tries to get her to play and most of the time it works. She still gets tired though and it's so hard seeing her like that. I'm use to seeing her running around and having fun. She is still loving her walks though, but I hate to leave her alone for to long.
Plus, this is happening all so quickly. She was just diagnosed last Novermber and it's already January. Time is flying by way to quickly and I wish it would just slow down. I also wish that God would answer my prayers Her last visit, the vet said something that scared me. Before we left, she said that she would see us in a month, which is what I'm used to, but then she added on "unless something happens".
Now, I'm looking for every little sign from Farrah.
Please God. I'm begging you. Answer our prayers and let us have a miracle with Farrah. Please.
This has been a trying weekend. Farrah had her monthy visit this past Friday. Her mass has doubled in size. It went from 4 centimeters by 2 centimeters to 8 centimeters by 5 centimeters. Her vet also said that while the lymph nodes still felt alright, she's positive that the cancer has spread to them, considering it happens very early in the course and who knows how long Farrah was dealing with it before being diagnosed.
There was also a book on animal health and it has a little bit on Adenocarcinoma in it. It said that surgery was the most common way to get rid of it, but most dogs died about halfway then what they would have if they didn't have the surgery. Meaning, they normally died about six months after surgery. I'm glad I opted not to do it, because I would have lost Farrah already, if I did. The good news is that she is in NO PAIN, whatsoever. She even let the vet do the annual "anal" check by herself and didn't even budge.
I walked out of there with her, then started crying. I know this is coming. I know I'm prepared to lose her, but it seemed to have hit hard then. Just wanted to keep you all updated.
A very sad Mom.
Thanks to Blossom at Dogster for posting this link. It's a golden retriever and his owner dancing to a song from the movie "Grease". Enjoy!!!
Farrah, I and the rest of the family would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and a very Happy New Year!
Also, Farrah has her next appointment coming up on the 30th, so please pray for good news! Thanks everyone.
And she enjoyed it. She got her treats, since she doesn't like toys. LOL She's had a very good weekend. She even looks younger in her face. She plays with Gypsy and Keifer (one of the cats) and it is good to see that. I never thought that I would see her do that again. Thank the good lord!!! Let's just keep going this way and having a lot of positive experiences.